March 6, 2008

12-Step Botnet Recovery Program

My 12-step botnet recovery program, originally presented at DC404.

  1. Admit that you are powerless over bots.
  2. Believe that a power greater than yourself exists and is necessary to identify and eliminate malware, botnets, and the Windows hosts that contain them.
  3. Make a decision to turn your will and your life over to ShadowServer, Malfease or another similar volunteer effort.
  4. Make a searching and fearless inventory of your Windows machines.
  5. Admit to another security expert that you [have/do] run Windows.
  6. Demonstrate readiness to remove Windows from your PC.
  7. Humbly ask other experts to remove Windows from your machine.
  8. Make a list of all other machines you’ve infected.
  9. Make amends to those infected, i.e. with Mac OS, Ubuntu, FreeBSD or similar.
  10. Continue to inventory remaining Windows hosts, and when infected, format & re-install.
  11. Seek through prayer, meditation and continuing malware research to improve your understanding of the growing malware threat as we know it.
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening, carry this message to other Windows users.

Please enjoy and disseminate widely.

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